Week 2, Day 6

Labor Day is over, it was a beautiful week end, best days in a row we've had this summer, lots of festivals, parades, friends, food and more. I spent Friday afternoon with my good, wonderful, long time friend and her baby Cortney,(29) and her babies, Luke, who was a patient at Hope Hospital, and Lainey, his twin sister, at the Ronald McDonald house, her hubby Cody arrived and her long time friend, since grade school, Jessie, and we had a lovely, wonderful day that was blessed with the happy ending that Luke went home today, after a week of serious, cardiac surgery, he's 3 months old and before you know it he'll be on a football field, driving a car, and then off to college. I just can't say how totally wonderful, happy the McDonald house is, amazing, and I'm full of warm, fuzzy feelings from being with all of them, and Judy, she is a wonderful gramma, so giving, so full of love it oozes from her being, its easy to see, that her life is full, she lives on a body of water and her soul is with God, as are the kids, cort and cody.

Saturday was an uneventful day, we had a supper of steak, baked potatoes and then for dessert we made a trip to The Creamery, mmmm, wonderful ! Sunday, my baby, Justine and I went to see the movie, Adam, about a man with Aspergers, informative, warm, funny, wistful, I give it 5 *'s, but, you'll have to rent it because it won't be out in the rural areas, but we learned so much from watching it, I ordered two books that were used in the movies to learn how to help, guide and love Christopher even more than I already do, if that's possible.....???

Today, Sunday, I went to Oak Park and met my friend, Darrelle and we went to see the movie, "Extract", Jason Bateman, Ben Afleck, a good, funny movie with no lessons learned, just entertaining, and I give it 4*s.....and also recommend this film tooooo.... so, all in all, with friends and Justine it was a good, good week end.

Now, we come to Stan, and that is another story, I fear something is really going on inside of that man's head, heart, at this time, he is out of the box, that's all I can say. The relationship has come to an end, and actually, I am relieved, he hasn't passed the 7 year mark with a woman and it won't be any different for me, so, the meter has run out of coins.. I am trying to decide where I'm going to live, a large part of me would like to end up in Oak Park, IL, a lovely, very ecclectic city nearest Chicago, still has a very vibrant downtown, bookstores, restaurants, a wonderful movie theatre that all residents can walk to, you see kids in groups going downtown, riding skateboards, a lovely city park that is still safe to spend time in, there is no loitering of scumbums in this town, no homeless people, "taverns" don't exist, its just nice, with Metra and the Green Line going right along the main street(Lake St), it's still affordable with a lot of subsidized housing for senior people, which I am at this time....
then, there is Ottawa, and it's there I want to be for a different reason, the boys, Christopher and Ryan and of course, wonderful Justine, and then there is the proximity to my friends, and that is such a big draw, but....No work !!!! now, I have applied for social security disability, but that could take 6 months to hear and I do think that I will be approved due to the fact I just can't explain, teach, perform the care what I used to do for patients and couldn't work as a nurse any longer, and it's been a good career, I've met some wonderful people and have a large network of friends, but...how much longer would I have done it anyway???? I never wanted to be an Old, Crochity nurse anyway, I remember them well, oh, Lucille Lenhausen, so I feel it's time to hang that up anyway...but, can I survive on just that? that is where my idea for a change in careers came from, and it's still helping people, being with people but not in nursing capacity but would give me "extra" money for vacations and the concerts I still love to go tooooo, such as the stones, the eagles, steeley dan, cute Michael McDonald to name just a "few."
I can always GO to Oakpark to see my friend, and spend the day or a few nights with her, and she could come to the country and see me, what shall I do??
Tomorrow, after yet another dentist appointment, I am going to Ottaw to look at some apartments and duplexes and just begin scoping it out, go to the store and tell my favorite manager to start keeping boxes for me, and I will begin to pack one more time, in a very organized way, cause I hate asking my son in law to move me one more time, I am really going to slim things down this time, will have what I am moving down to the bearest minimum.
Now, you ask, what part will Jim play in this? Well, Jim has way too many issues for me to deal with, I will be his friend, and maybe at some time we can be together, but this move is about me, only for me, only by myself with Winston and Binky and Furbie, and I will begin a journey of my own, being the best I can be, and with the help, support of my friends, I am really going to find myself and be my very own best friend. It's time for me, I've given all I can to men, and now realize just how co dependent I have been for a long time, and I'm going to laugh more!!!!

Tomorrow, the sense of humor will return, I've been very teary since Friday, that day, because I realized how much love there is all around me, if I only open my eyes and heart to it...There were people that were really "glad" to see me on Friday, Sunday and today, and I "need" to concentrate on them, rejoice they are in my life, and move ahead.

So, from "Strawberry Fields", it's good night, good luck and keep on doing what ever it is your doing, cuz I know its right !!!!!!!!!!

Winstons mom ..... and he's happy tonight, cuz I have a new room of my own and he's sleeping for the first night on the foot of the bed......so, see, a hairy male does want to sleep with me and he doesn't have bad breath or snore.....

Good night or Good morning, think about me tomorrow and smile !!!!

I'm Sherry